The Encounter: A Biblical Vampire Tale
November 12, 2017

By Rabbi Royi Shaffin

Based on the film “Interview With The Vampire”, Parashat Toldot, and Parashat Vayishlach.
A skilled hunter, he went out into the field to hunt game. He expected this to be an easy catch, but was not prepared for what awaited him in the middle of the field behind trees and bushes, an ambush.
This was no ordinary ambush. Esau was seized by two powerful arms with hands as powerful as metal clamps. The face before him was pale, lifeless, and apathetic to his fear. Esau trembled. Never before had he, as strong and athletic as he was, been so easily overpowered by another person. He wondered if he was indeed in the presence of a human being or some other creature. The eyes had no color but were entirely black and his face had the expression of a carnivorous animal on the hunt. The face of the creature had the color of a man on his death bed. It was an odd and disconcerting sight.
Yet, this creature was far from dead. It moved toward him and opened its mouth. The front of the mouth contained large, shiny, sharp white fangs. They were a beautiful pearly white except for a few spots of red upon them. The creature closed its mouth upon Esau’s bare neck and Esau fell to the ground. He could feel the blood dripping from the side of his neck.
The creature came down upon Esau and placed his mouth upon Esau’s wound. He sucked on the blood and then sucked blood out of Esau’s body. Esau grew weaker and weaker and every time he tried to get up, the creature kept him down easily with his enormous power.
On the brink of death, Esau cried for his father. “Isaac,” he cried out. Then he called out, “God of my father Isaac and my grandfather Abraham, please help me.” Frightened, the creature withdrew his mouth from Esau. He stood up and observed his victim, close to death.
“You will not die,” the creature spoke, “for you are the son of prophets.  You should have been protected from me but your deeds must have diminished the power and shield of prophecy with which you were born. You must have done evil in the eyes of God. Nevertheless, you will not die. I cannot make you live either. You will be one like me, a man who exists in a different realm of existence in between life and death. Just as you were born a hairy wild animal, so will you continue to hunt and devour prey. Just as you have spilled blood, so will you continue to thirst for blood.”
Esau fell into a deep sleep. When he awoke, he felt like he was no longer himself. His sight had changed. It was sharper and he was better able to perceive spiritual beings from the other world. He was now one of them. He had not only gained back his strength but doubled it or perhaps even tripped it. Yet, he did not feel alive.
Esau returned home from the field. He was famished. He did not crave food, but blood.
Jacob was preparing his brew in his caldron and concocting his plot. Looking into his book for direction, ingredients went into the pot one by one.
“Are you going to give me some of that blood or aren’t you?” Esau screamed at Jacob.
“It isn’t for you,” answered Jacob. “It is a potion. It does contain blood so you are not permitted to eat it. Remember the laws of Noah.”
“They no longer apply to me. I am no longer among the living,” Esau replied.
Jacob thought for a moment. “I will give it to you in exchange for the birthright.”
“I am half-dead,” said Esau. “What use is the birthright to me now?”
“Swear!” Jacob insisted.
Esau placed his hand on his chest and swore.
Jacob took his ladle and scooped up some of his concoction into a bowl for Esau.
Esau placed his spoon inside the bowl and scooped out the adashim, the cows eye balls that Jacob had placed inside.
Esau ate and slurped the bloody concoction. He was satisfied. He left without saying another word.
Years later, the brothers met again as Jacob was returning home. Jacob had fled from his brother’s wrath for he felt that his life was in danger. Indeed it was.
As he was returning, Esau came toward him with hundreds of troops. Jacob sent gifts of livestock in front of him to appease his angry brother. His brother met him and it appeared as if he was going to kiss him on the cheek. As Esau got closer, however, two fangs appeared and pierced through Jacob’s cheek. Esau moved away quickly. He knew that Jacob was off limits but Jacob understood the meaning of what had just happened. He knew that he and Esau could never live together again and he must move as far away from Esau as possible. Esau hungered for blood. His brother, Esau, was a vampire.

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Wisdom for Life from the Source:Teachings that will make you a better person and the world a better place.
May 14, 2017

Originally published in “City Beat Magazine”

By Royi Shaffin
1) Whenever you feel like saying something negative, don’t!!!
Stop yourself before it comes out of your mouth. You can do it. Once it is out, it can’t go back in. Once you have blemished someone’s good name, you have damaged their reputation forever. It is like tearing open a feather pillow and letting the feathers out to the wind. If you change your mind, you will never be able to gather all of the feathers.
If you are a person that people listen to, your responsibility is even greater. Don’t use foul language because it pollutes the world and lowers your esteem in people’s eyes. A debate is about ideas. Criticize ideas, not people. Don’t reduce yourself to the level of a school playground. Don’t be a bully. Don’t be a victim either. Seek peace, always.
2) Wear a reminder on your hand, between your eyes, on the corners of your garments, or whatever it takes… to spread only positive energy and to protect you against the negative.
Place words of goodness and blessing, gratefulness and thankfulness, kindness and mercy upon your body. Wind them around your arm. Place them at the entrance to your home. Speak words of blessing day and night.
3) Be the source of the positive.
Find teachers and friends. In a world where a role model is hard to find, you be the role model. Create a family. Love someone. Pass your legacy on to children. Have faith in the future.

4) Give people the benefit of the doubt.
We are all human. We all make mistakes. Try to see the good in people. Believe that people have the best of intentions unless conclusively proven otherwise.
5) Be grateful for all that you have.
Pay attention to everything that people do for you and for others. Say daily affirmations for that which is good and right in the world and that for which you are grateful.

Be mindful when you eat and drink and breathe. Be grateful even when you go to the bathroom. These are all gifts. A functioning body, food to eat, clean water to drink, air to breathe, healthy lungs to breathe it with are all gifts. Do not take them for granted. Pay attention to the tastes in your mouth when you eat.

Someone put time and energy and TLC to make sure that your food tastes good.
6) Be in touch with nature.
Go outside. Take off your shoes and run around in the grass. Pay attention to the feeling of grass in between your toes. Watch the sunrise. Watch the sunset. Be grateful for being able to enjoy the beauty of the world.
Cherish animals. Make a new friend who just so happens to be a dog or a cat. Listen to the songs of the birds.
Protect the planet. Recycle. Do not waste. Don’t throw away food.

Travel the planet. Experience different people, different cultures, and different plant and animal life.
7) Be of outstanding character.
Mean what you say. Say what you mean. Don’t lie. Be a person of truth that people can depend on. Pay workers on time. If you owe money, pay on time. If you owe rent or mortgage, pay on time. If you have credit cards, pay on time. If you owe someone a phone call, call them. If you owe someone an apology, apologize.
8) Be generous with your money, your compliments, your positive facial expressions, your time, your talents, and your good will.
Visit the sick, the old, the dying, and the bereaved and send positive energy their way. Put your arm around someone who needs a hug.
9) Learn, study, read, teach, play, explore, investigate, think, be open-minded, train your brain, try new things, and try to improve as a human being.
Make yourself smarter, faster, more knowledgeable, healthier, more active. Become the best you that you can become and then try to become even better than that and while you are doing that, teach others to do the same.
10) Remember that we are all one. The entire universe is One.
The divisions between us are just an illusion. Treat your fellow human being as a brother or sister. We all come from the same place and our destiny is to all return to that place. So be kind, compassionate, loving, caring, and understanding.
May whatever positive energy you send out be returned to you seven fold.
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The Prince of Egypt Speaks – A Modern Midrash Reaction to “Prince of Egypt”
October 14, 2016

By Rabbi Royi Shaffin

And God said unto Moses go unto Pharoah and tell him

let my people go for if you do not let my people go I will

What?  What are you going to do now God?
I’m going to smite
You mean murder
All of the first born of Egypt from the first born of the cattle to the first born of the servants to the first born of the Pharoah.
What? You’re going to kill my nephew. No.
Go unto Pharoah and tell him to

let my people go.
Why are you doing this to me? You caused me to leave my parents to fight against my brother.  You destroyed all of the food of the country I love.  You made my people sick with boils.  You made them thirst for water.  You caused our animals to die and locust to eat the remaining plants so that my family is hungry. You threw hail down from the sky with fire inside it and it hit my brother and his wife and my cousins. They are waking around with third degree burns.
You made complete darkened. Do you know how scary that is?  And now you are going to kill my nephew. No. You can’t do that. That was not part of the deal. This is the family and nation that raised me, taught me, educated me, and fed me. Why have you made me into a traitor against my own family, my own people?
Maybe Pharoah will listen this time.
He will not listen nor will he let my people go so that I may show my signs and wonders in Egypt.
Then I’ll bring my family into my house with the lambs blood on the door post.
You will do no such thing for your family is the family of Pharoah and unless he feels the plague personally he will not let my people go.
God, why are you doing this to me?

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